Vasek Pospisil - Thoughts from Rimouski

Submitted by Pro Players on Sun, 03/13/2011 - 6:42pm



Hi Everyone,

Well, here it is, my first official blog. This will definitely be one of the best ones ever written so I suggest you get some popcorn and enjoy this masterpiece.

I am sitting in the car with Fred Niemeyer on our way to Rimouski for a Challenger. I wouldn't even call it a car actually; today its more of a plane because we're running a bit late. We're supposed to pick up Peter (Polansky) from the Quebec City airport along the way. It's normally about a 7 hour drive from Sherbrooke (where I played my last tournament) to Rimouski but at the rate we keep filling up our gas tank, we might be there in 4 or 5. We're definitely burning some fuel right now. Fred could start his own Airline if his in-flight services make some improvements.

Along the way, we had to stop at an electronic store to get an iCable because theres no chance I would be able to sit this many hours in a car with no music from my ipod. And because my voice is so awesome and Fred loves it so much, I try to sing along to as many songs as i can .

Anyways, I met some cute girls in Sherbrooke that I feel I should share with you. One in particular but I cant say her name. I've actually known her for a few years now but that's all the info you get! She's a cutie

In general I find the girls are very good looking in eastern Canada. There are some good ones in the west too, dont get me wrong, but the overall percentage of good looking girls seems to be higher in the East. (If you're a good looking girl in Vancouver and just read this, I take it back. Add me on facebook!)

I will go to the club later today to see the physio to get some treatment on my ankle and my butt cheeks because Olivia (Fred's 2 1/2 year old daughter) kept slapping my butt and running away last week and its a bit sore. To make things worse, all Fred and Annie (Fred's girlfriend) did was laugh about it. Apparently its a game that play at home, which I do not approve of!

I just realized that this may not only be the best blog ever written but quite possible the longest too; and since the combination of the speed, the music, and the typing is making me nauseous, I think it's a good time to wrap things up here.

I will probably play my first match on Tuesday so wish me luck!

If you have any questions or comments please leave them below

Thanks for reading, everyone!

Vasek (Vashy)

P.S. Just realized it's actually not that long of a blog; its actually pretty short but I promise my next one will be longer .

www.lovemeansnothing.ca/blog

Vasek Pospisil - "Posway"

Submitted by Pro Players on Mon, 03/21/2011 - 12:38pm



Hi Everyone,

Following the success of my first blog and appearances on Leno and CNN, I'll make sure this one is just as entertaining. If it's not, at least it's longer than the first one so hopefully I get some bonus points for effort. I'm more nervous writing blogs now then I am playing matches. I don't really know what that means, but I'll try not to overanalyze it.

Once again this blog comes to you from the passenger, or co-pilot, seat of the FredExpress. This time though, we are heading back to Montreal from Rimouski. The FredExpress is not disappointing right now and we are breaking records as we approach Montreal. I think my last blog must have encouraged the driver. I have to remind him sometimes that we're not actually in a Formula 1 race and that the people in front of us are not trying to intentionally slow us down or block us.

We knew after I released my first blog that the police would be onto us so we left a day early to prevent an ambush. Oh, how cunning we are!

I'm the only DJ in the car today (Polansky finally left to Miami, good riddance. I joke, you are missed bud). As soon as I found out Fred likes his oldies, it had to be 70s and 80's disco music!! Final Countdown on repeat, definitely the way to go! Fred looks a bit too happy right now though so I think I'll change the song. He has that crazy rock 'n' roll look in his eye.

We had a pit stop a while ago at a gas station and I got one of those blue-coloured no name slushies. I think it’s one of those that has so much sugar and tastes so bad that it's forbidden to be called anything. There was more sugar in there than ice. I was about to fall asleep, but literally one sip later, I was pulling off some disco dance moves to the blasting 70s music in the car while Fred pretended not to be impressed.

I promised that I wouldn’t talk about him too much in my blog this time, but he'll soon realize, after he reads this, that I lied . I have all the power here Fred… Muhahaha!

He is so intense when I play my matches that I sometimes worry he will have a heart attack or pass out during one of them. He might even lose a few teeth from biting so hard when he does his fist pump (after every point I win) but I'm sure he has a good dental plan. I lost in the semis on Saturday, but it may have indirectly saved his life because I don’t think he would have survived another match. He's almost as intense during my matches as he is when the Habs are playing. That's when it's safest to keep your distance until the Habs finally lose, as always. And then it's trash talking time . Go Canucks!

I had subway for lunch again today. People who know me know that I could eat Subway everyday for lunch and dinner, and sadly, some weeks of the year, I do. Not only do I eat at Subway everyday when I'm at a tournament, I get the same sub too. Before a match I take a footlong grilled chicken breast and my post-match or "day off" sub is the Italian BMT . Currently, I'm riding on a twelve day Subway streak and I like my chances of hitting the two week mark in a few days. The only thing that might stop me is Panda Express (no, not another airline, chinese food). I honestly think that I'm the only reason Subway didn't go bankrupt during the economic crisis, and you'd have trouble convincing me otherwise. “Posway” is what it should really be called now.

I have to say though, staying on the Subway topic, that as much as I eat there, very few subway employees ever get my sub just the way I like it. There are always either too many onions, not enough southwest sauce (there can never be enough southwest sauce), or not enough lettuce. And I've gone to Subway so many times that I know exactly what the employee will do before they do it. Judging by the person’s sex, weight, or personality, I can tell you exactly which of the three mistakes they will make with my sub.

Well, now that we're done talking about Subway and coach Fred, I'm sort of hitting a wall here. You know you're struggling with ideas when you're looking at random words on billboards for blogging material. I think this blog is long enough so I'll call it a day and watch for police ahead. You know, help out a bit.

Nothing on girls this week. Sorry fellas, maybe next week.

Vashy

www.lovemeansnothing.ca/blog

Pospisil: I'm a big kid now!

Submitted by Pro Players on Tue, 04/19/2011 - 11:33am



Hey Everyone,

I realize that my last entry was almost a month ago but I promise you there is a reason for everything. Apart from the obvious one of not wanting to spoil you, I also realize that there are jobs on the line here so maybe I am trying to slow down a bit and not be so awesome. Also, you know you have to change something when people come up to congratulate you on your blog entries rather than the 3 ½ hour match you just won in 35C heat with full body cramps (not actually, but trying to make a point here!). After all, I am a tennis player and not a world class writer who secretly wants a job at Tennis Canada (any offers guys? because I'll consider).

Well I just finished a stretch of three tournaments and I'm now in Florida enjoying my day off and writing this blog and watching the news simultaneously, which isn't easy to do but luckily I'm a great multitasker. One time, I was texting, driving, and sleeping at the same time. Now that is not easy to do! I know texting while driving is bad, but somehow it feels right when you sleep as you do it.

I was on the road for two weeks without my coach (I'm, A, Big, Kid, Now!) but he joined me last week in Tallahassee so it was great to have him back. Poor guy had to get a new passport and change his name to get a rental car. Honestly, everyone from the tournament director to the guy asking for change by the Subway knew about Fred's driving. I have no idea how they could possibly know yet he keeps insisting that it is somehow my fault. Something to do with my last blogs or something but I wasn't really paying attention; and I definitely don't remember writing anything about his driving in any of my last blogs.

I was also in Oklahoma and Arkansas during the last couple weeks and I definitely had some interesting experiences! Everytime I told someone that I was Canadian there would be some kind of a strange reaction. They would either just stare in amazement or burst out laughing. Both of which made me feel extremely uncomfortable. I seemed to be somewhat of a tourist attraction in those parts and several people came out to watch "the Canadian". "Theres a Canadian here? Amazing! How did he get here, by Camel?". For y'all information, we got planes and trains and bikes and cars and everythin' up in ol' Canada.

I have heard some good things about Rebecca Marino's blogs so I went to take a look but didn't really see any. Haha just kidding, great blogs! Why shouldn’t they be? She is, after all, from Vancouver and it’s a known fact that Vancouverites are just awesomer (yeah, I just used that word and there's nothing you can do about it) than the rest. I mean let’s be honest here, Vancouver is the best city in Canada and possibly, the world (unless you consider Europe a part of the world. In that case we're far from it). Think about it; we have the best hockey team, tastiest sushi (thank you Japan), amazing summers, and best looking Pospisils.

Since I'm hitting another wall here I think I'll start talking about food again and let you all know that I just destroyed four Cadbury Cream Eggs (I know I shouldn't be eating sweets but give me a break, it’s my day off!). I mean, I probably ate them all in less than 2 minutes. Those things didn't stand a chance from the moment I laid eyes on them. When Easter passes and the cream egg vanishes from stores, there is a high chance I will go into a depression. I think the most reasonable thing to do is go to Walmart and buy them in bulk tomorrow to avoid that. Pretty random, I know, but it's not like my blogs have any structure whatsoever. I had to share my thoughts on the cream egg with someone right now and who better to share it with than you, the 5 or 6 people that will actually read my blog.

Alright everyone, I'm really tired so it's time for me sing a lullaby and put myself to sleep.

Goodnight

Vashy

www.lovemeansnothing.ca/blog

Pospisil: You want me to sign your what?

Submitted by Pro Players on Mon, 05/09/2011 - 11:00am

Hi Everyone,

I am actually in Korea right now but this blog will be a quick summary of my trip in Mexico.

I spent a week there with Coach Fred and an interesting week it was. A bit of tennis here, some NHL radio playoff action there, a session of chest signing, and an order of food poisoning on the side. After all, you have to have food poisoning to really get the full Mexican experience so I made sure I was able to cross that off my list.

The single most frustrating thing about the week there was, without a doubt, our inability to watch an NHL playoff game. Sure, there were about 4-5 channels in the hotel that showed soccer where the commentators would scream "GOOOOAAALLL" for five minutes every time a player managed to put it past the goalie, but nothing, and I mean nothing, hockey related could be found! Of course, some of you might be thinking "Why didn’t they just watch it online?” If you're one of these people then clearly you have never been to Mexico and used the internet down there. Finding a good connection is about as likely as finding a gold nugget in your bowl of cereal, and then choking on it. It was, however, barely good enough to listen to NHL radio. We huddled close enough to Fred's computer that I could tell whether or not he showered after getting back to the hotel.

On my last day in Mexico I took a taxi to the club (alone) which, with all the stories you hear, was probably not the best idea a Pospisil ever had. But I gathered my courage and after sweating through my last good shirt on the way, I was surprisingly taken directly to the front door with a smile on the guy’s face after I underpaid him. Not quite the cab experience I was expecting. I wasn’t about to risk taking a cab twice in one day so I took the tournament limo transport on the way back. Yea, that's right, limo Fred left the day before and he was generous enough to leave his upgraded Fred Express Limo (I photo-shopped the photo to make Fred better looking but the rest of it is intact) behind in Mexico for the tournament to use until it finished. He finally took my advice and upgraded the quality of his in-flight services. Champagne anyone?

Before I end this blog I need to come clean and talk a bit about one of the most interesting and disturbing autograph signing experiences of my career. Last week in Mexico, I signed a boob! But not the kind of boob you're thinking. Not the boob of a hot girl or someone’s mom. Heck, it wasn't even a boob of an 80 year old granny. Nope, it was a man-boob! What could be worse?! Actually it was a 14 year old boy. Let me explain before you start jumping to conclusions. After I finished my first round match I came off the court and signed a few routine autographs before some kid started begging me to sign his chest (he used a different word that is not appropriate for this blog but was very impressive vocabulary if you ask me). At first I thought it was some kind of a joke but soon, to my disappointment, I realized that if I didn’t do it, he would probably start bawling on the spot. I just stood there confused, but my doubles partner, Nick Monroe, walked by just in time so I immediately went to him for counselling. "Are you serious? Just sign it, ha-ha". Had he not given me the ok, I'm not sure I would have gone through with it, but just like that, 5 seconds later, I was a changed man. Possibly scarred for life by the event. Definitely not the way I imagined signing my first boob. Happy Gilmore is a few giant steps ahead of me in this field.

I will go see a psychiatrist now and send my next blog from Korea.

Don’t think you want me going into details of the food poisoning so I'll leave it at that and let you imagine how great that must have been.

Vashy

P.S. Big news, you can now follow me on twitter @VasekPospisil. Just don’t expect me to entertain you. Actually, don’t... don’t follow me.

www.lovemeansnothing.ca/blog

Pospisil: How do you say hello in Korean?

Submitted by Pro Players on Wed, 06/08/2011 - 10:33am

Hello in Korean,

Well I'm now back in Montreal after a three week trip in Korea. It wasn't an easy one by all means but it was a good one. There were some bad moments and at times it was a grind, but overall, it was fun and I enjoyed Korea (trying to be politically correct at the start because we all know that will change soon).

Sadly though, hardly anyone speaks English in this country. It was harder to find an English speaking person than it is for me to do 10 squats without going into a full body cramp. It is pretty much impossible to ask for directions or order food. Every time I pointed at a type of meat the response would be "chicken" and I really don't believe that I was eating "chicken" every single meal for three weeks straight unless there are 30 different kinds of chicken meat which seems quite unlikely. Apart from the communication and jet-lag, which is brutal when you travel to a country as far from home as Korea (unless you're Chuck Norris), it wasn't bad at all.

And now for some story telling...

During my last tournament, in the second round I played a Korean guy who clearly must have bribed the umpire with some cat meat or an imported "How to Drive an Automobile" book because within the first few games I had four bad line calls and by the time the first set finished, Fred was throwing pens on the court and blowing vocal chords. Or maybe my opponent told the umpire before the match that I don’t fart in public (after the amount of times I've seen this during my trip, I'm starting to think it's a sign of respect in Korea. I'll invest in a gas mask the next time I go there) to build some hatred towards me. Balls hit by my opponent that were 2-3 inches out were called in and balls I would hit on the line were called out. At one point Fred stormed off the court to get the tournament supervisor and I swear I could see a vain popping out of his forehead from the other end of the court. "Jesus Christ!” His favourite line. But I’m not gonna sit here and pretend I was acting like an angel during all of this, I even surprised myself at some of the things that came out of my mouth. I didn’t know I had the guts or the imagination to say some of the things I said. I may have even invented a few words. I wish I could write some of the things I said on this blog but I'm afraid the Korean authorities might use Google translate and then escort me to North Korea for proper punishment. Amazingly, I managed to do all of this on the court without getting a warning. Maybe the umpire didn't know how to say "warning". When Fred returned with the Supervisor and an espresso in his hand (this guy is addicted to caffeine), suddenly, for the two games the supervisor was present, the bad calls stopped. Sure enough, he left when he saw the calls were fair and that's when they started again. I have never been this angry after a match that I ended up winning, and I let the tournament officials know it after the match! Had I lost, I don’t think I would be writing this blog in Canada but on a prison cell wall with Fred in the cell next to me listening to the same song on his iPod on repeat (he really needs some new songs).

Also during the last tournament I witnessed something I have never seen anywhere else in the world. No not the electric toilet, or the video game commentating on TV, or even the rat that became dinner, but a two-ball tennis can.

One can of two balls for the whole week is all we got for practice. At first I thought you would either have to be legally insane to allow something like this, but soon, after observing the way people in Korea practice or learn the sport, I realized why they only need two balls (which is the case with most male breeds). The coaches here, when they are having lessons with their players (young or old), don't have baskets of balls to drill or practice with, they have shopping carts full of them. The players, whether they are learning to play or have already achieved a decent level, hit thousands and thousands of balls. After hitting so many balls, it’s no surprise that once they reach the pros they only need two balls for practice. And that's all I have to say about that. I’m so smart. I like chocolate. I have an imaginary friend.

Anyway, that’s all for today folks.

Vashy

@VasekPospisil

P.S. Follow me on Twitter because I would like nothing more than to be cool and have a lot of followers . @VasekPospisil, in case you missed the first one.

P.P.S. Don’t forget to Follow me on Twitter @VasekPospisil (in case you missed the P.S.)

www.lovemeansnothing.ca/blog